Letâs talk about the stuff that ruins the love story before the credits even roll. đ
Contents
- 1 1. Silent Treatment: The Ultimate Relationship Freeze-Out
- 2 2. Keeping Score Like Itâs the Relationship Olympics
- 3 3. Putting Phones Over People
- 4 4. Avoiding Conflict (a.k.a. Emotional Ghosting)
- 5 5. Expecting Mind-Reading Superpowers
- 6 6. Neglecting Emotional Intimacy
- 7 7. Over-Criticism (aka Death by a Thousand Cuts)
- 8 8. Lack of Appreciation
- 9 9. Jealousy in Overdrive
- 10 10. Unrealistic Expectations
- 11 11. Withholding Affection
- 12 12. Lack of Support for Goals and Growth
- 13 13. Living in the Past
- 14 14. Manipulative Behavior
- 15 15. Stonewalling (aka the Human Brick Wall)
- 16 16. Poor Communication Around Sex
- 17 17. One-Sided Effort
- 18 18. Trying to “Fix” Each Other
- 19 19. Lying (Even About the Small Stuff)
- 20 20. Taking Each Other for Granted
- 21 Quick Recap: The Relationship Killers You Want to Avoid
- 22 FAQs
Ever been in a relationship that felt perfect⌠until it wasnât?
One minute, you’re swapping playlists and laughing at dumb inside jokes. The next? You’re side-eyeing their texts, fighting over pizza toppings, and wondering, âWait, when did we become roommates who barely talk?â
Letâs be realârelationships donât usually crash and burn in one big explosion. Nope. They erode bit by bit thanks to small habits that seem harmless at first but eventually snowball into massive issues.
And yeah, Iâve been there. Trust me, you donât want to wait until someone says, âWe need to talk.â (Yikes.)
So grab your emotional toolkit (and maybe a snack), and letâs unpack 20 toxic relationship habits that sneakily mess everything up.
1. Silent Treatment: The Ultimate Relationship Freeze-Out
You think ignoring your partner is âgiving them spaceâ? Nah. Youâre basically hitting pause on the relationship and expecting it to fix itself.
Healthy relationships need communicationânot cold wars. Talk it out. Sulking in silence just creates more confusion (and low-key resentment).
2. Keeping Score Like Itâs the Relationship Olympics
âOh, you forgot my birthday in 2019? Cool. Iâll bring that up every time Iâm mad.â
If you’re constantly tallying each other’s mistakes, you’re not solving problemsâyouâre stockpiling ammo. đ
Forgive. Reset. Move forward. Relationships arenât games, so stop trying to âwin.â
3. Putting Phones Over People
We get itâTikTok is addictive. But when you’re scrolling while theyâre pouring their heart out, it sends one loud message: Iâd rather be anywhere but here.
FYI: Eye contact is still a thing. So is being present. đ
4. Avoiding Conflict (a.k.a. Emotional Ghosting)
Nobody loves arguments (except maybe reality TV producers), but avoiding tough convos is like letting a leak grow into a flood.
Disagreements are healthyâas long as you handle them like adults and not toddlers in a sandbox.
5. Expecting Mind-Reading Superpowers
Donât say âIâm fineâ when youâre clearly ready to explode. Your partnerâs not a psychic. Use your words. Like, actual words.
Assumptions are just unspoken resentments waiting to hatch.
6. Neglecting Emotional Intimacy
You know what kills love faster than cheating? Emotional neglect. When you stop asking, listening, caringâthatâs when the cracks really start to show.
Itâs not always about the grand gestures. Sometimes, just asking âHow was your day?â does wonders.
7. Over-Criticism (aka Death by a Thousand Cuts)
A little feedback? Cool. Constant nitpicking? Thatâs exhausting.
When every conversation turns into a complaint checklist, your partner starts to feel more like a project than a person.
Nobody wants to feel like theyâre never enough. Chill with the critiques.
8. Lack of Appreciation
So they cooked dinner, fed the dog, and fixed your Wi-Fi⌠and all they got was a âmehâ?
Saying thank you isn’t hard. But not saying it? That adds up fast.
Appreciation fuels connection. Don’t skip it.
9. Jealousy in Overdrive
Feeling a little jealous now and then? Human. Stalking their coworkers on Instagram? Uh, not so much.
Excessive jealousy = insecurity + control. And no, itâs not cute. Itâs a fast pass to trust issues.
10. Unrealistic Expectations
Look, no one is a rom-com character. Your partner will forget anniversaries, wear ugly socks, and occasionally fart during Netflix.
Stop expecting perfection. Start embracing reality.
11. Withholding Affection
Being ânot in the moodâ sometimes is fine. But if affection vanishes completely, itâs a red flag waving in your relationship’s face.
Physical touch, kind words, thoughtful gesturesâit all matters. Donât skip the love language stuff.
12. Lack of Support for Goals and Growth
If your partner wants to go back to school, launch a business, or run a marathon, donât just say âcoolâ and scroll on.
Support = love in action. Help them thrive, not just survive.
13. Living in the Past
Constantly bringing up your ex? Holding grudges from that fight in 2021?
Thatâs emotional baggage, babe. And it’s suffocating your present.
Deal with the past, but donât live there.
14. Manipulative Behavior
Guilt-tripping. Gaslighting. Ultimatums.
If youâre doing thisâor letting it happen to youâitâs not just a bad habit. Itâs emotional toxicity.
And yes, it will destroy the relationship eventually. No exceptions.
15. Stonewalling (aka the Human Brick Wall)
Shutting down during a conflict and refusing to engage is not a flex. Itâs emotional abandonment.
Be honest. Be vulnerable. Be present. Thatâs how real connection happens.
16. Poor Communication Around Sex
Sex isnât just about, well⌠sex. Itâs about connection, trust, and understanding each otherâs needs.
If things feel off in the bedroom but no oneâs talking about it? đ¨ Thatâs a silent relationship killer.
17. One-Sided Effort
Relationships are not 80/20. Or even 60/40. Theyâre 100/100. Both people should show up, give a damn, and put in the work.
If youâre always initiating, planning, or compromisingâit gets old real fast.
18. Trying to “Fix” Each Other
Your partner is not a broken toy. Stop trying to âupgradeâ their personality or âfixâ their quirks.
Love them as they areânot as you hope theyâll become.
19. Lying (Even About the Small Stuff)
White lies seem harmless, right? Wrong.
Lying chips away at trust like termites on wood. Even small lies create big cracks over time.
Just be honest. Itâs less messy. (And less exhausting.)
20. Taking Each Other for Granted
You used to write cute notes. Now itâs just, âDonât forget the milk.â
Taking your partner for granted is the final nail in the coffin. Love needs to feel aliveânot like a shared utility bill.
Surprise them. Compliment them. Hug them for no reason. Keep the spark from becoming static.
Quick Recap: The Relationship Killers You Want to Avoid
Hereâs your no-fluff cheat sheet of the 20 toxic relationship habits:
- Silent treatment
- Keeping score
- Prioritizing screens over conversations
- Avoiding conflict
- Expecting mind reading
- Emotional neglect
- Over-criticism
- Lack of appreciation
- Jealousy
- Unrealistic expectations
- Withholding affection
- No support for growth
- Living in the past
- Manipulation
- Stonewalling
- Poor sexual communication
- One-sided effort
- Trying to âfixâ them
- Lying
- Taking them for granted

Bold move? Fix one or two of these, and youâll feel the difference immediately. Fix most of them? Youâll probably stop Googling âWhy is my relationship so hard?â
Final Thought: Love Is WorkâBut the Good Kind
Letâs be honest. Relationships arenât always sunshine and makeout sessions. They take effort, patience, and self-awareness.
But hereâs the good news: most of these toxic relationship habits? You can fix them. Yep, even if youâve already messed up a few (or all).
Start small. Talk more. Appreciate often. And for the love of all things romanticâput your dang phone down once in a while. đ
So, got any of these bad habits lurking in your relationship? Time to kick ’em to the curb and show up like the awesome partner you are. đŞ
Because IMO, if youâve found someone worth lovingâyouâve also found someone worth fighting for.
Ready to do the work? Let’s go. â¤ď¸
P.S. If you caught yourself nodding along to more than five of these… donât panic. Awareness is the first step. The second? Sharing this with someone who needs a friendly reminder đ
FAQs
Q1: What are the most common toxic relationship habits?
Toxic relationship habits include poor communication, emotional neglect, jealousy, lying, and constant criticism.
Q2: How do toxic habits affect a relationship over time?
They slowly break trust, reduce emotional intimacy, and make partners feel unloved or unsupported.
Q3: Can unhealthy behaviors ruin a good relationship?
Yes, even one or two unhealthy behaviors can turn a healthy bond into a toxic relationship if not addressed early.
Q4: How can I identify toxic relationship habits in myself?
Watch for patterns like control, defensiveness, lack of appreciation, or avoiding emotional conversations.
Q5: Can toxic relationship habits be fixed?
Absolutely. With honest communication, self-awareness, and effort from both partners, habits can change.